My Intuitive Body

My Intuitive Body

Forty-three weeks pregnant I called to the sky
“I’m ready to have this baby now!”
full-moon meadow whispered response
as Greg read from a paper scrap he found in the grasses:

“love
happy
heart
family
good feeling
best in world

ovaries”

“Did you write that?”
I asked him.

“No, I found it. I thought it was yours and you dropped it.”

“It’s not mine… you really just found that?”

“Yes”

The poem was another bit of magic always present
from that moment forty-three weeks before
single moment mid love-making
single profound sensation felt once, never since
that had compelled me to say

“We’ve just conceived. I felt it.”

And then the name a few days later
“Raynah Genevieve” spiraled into my third eye.
“Raynah Genevieve!” I called to the sky
and the most beautiful female cardinal I’ve ever seen
flew before my face, inches away, hovered there,
landed on the tree limb next to me.
“Well hello sweet child”
“Yes it’s me. Your spirit child.” She flew off,
I walked on, repeated her name.
Instantly, the same bird landed in the tree I was approaching
and as I passed, she flew in one strong swoop
to the next tree and waited for me

From that moment on we were together.

Now, forty-three weeks later,
full belly ripe body fluids full moon february field and water sky this poem
about family and ovaries emerges from the grasses manifesting magic on a paper scrap in cattails
and I knew in a flash, announced to the sky “Our baby’s going to make an appearance tonite.”

I completed the very last page of my journal
while eyeing my new journal awaiting birth of its first entry.

fire warming february air, big belly bare mirroring full moon we sat facing.
Suddenly, honking geese, howling coyotes, wafting guitar, gushing surge
rushed through my body in a single breath

lifelong moment of silent eye connection

then we laughed laughed and laughed
my body surged waves of charged calm amidst chorus of napping cats, honey locust, lemon balm.

we sauntered indoors eventually…
sacred-altared, sandalwood-incensed, homemade-candlelit
I swayed showered breathed,
sipped raspberry-leaf and nettles tea
friends and midwife gathered singing

“Every breath taken in
by the man who loves
and by the woman who loves
goes to fill the water tank
where the spirit horses drink”

greg and I surfed on waves and dived in breath and crashed on crests of foaming swirls
I spun floated hurled whirled shat shivered smiled curled spooned arched stretched dug dove rose breathed glowed shuddered sighed moaned surged tingled

We circled sang grooved
on the rhythms of my hips:

“Where do we walk
we walk in the fire
where do we dance
we dance on the moon
Just like that grandmother
living inside her
We have the power of life
in the in the in the womb”

We circled sang grooved on the rhythms of my hips my body
free to move as it wanted to move and it
swayed and
swayed and
swayed and
swayed
into a squat I

heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaved earth cleft ancestral force fire lava silken water

birthed my baby
into soft hands and pink light
centered in the circle of new life

suddenly just like that

“we have our baby now”

my first words

“Hello Raynah Genevieve.
I’ve waited so long to meet you”

I brought Raynah to my breast
umbilical cord still attached I walked to the bed,
savoring forever those first ever moments
connection with old soul born through my very new body

--Diana Tigerlily